The Life of Harold

I saw Stranger than Fiction with P-Ade last winter and its hero, Harold Crick, starts out as a tax accountant who favors absolute structure in all parts of his life. He counts how many times he brushes each section of his teeth, he counts each step to the bus stop, he lives life by his clock. While by the end of the movie he lives life a little bit more rebelliously (and fuller, and freely) there is some comfort in knowing there is a numeric equivalent to life's little day to days.

It should come as a surprise to absolutely no one, then, that I now have a spreadsheet for the Kilt (current ETA is May 27th based on latest calculations) and that I can tell you definitively that:

• one large tub of LUSH's Ocean Salt Scrub lasts me 3.3 months
• one tank of gas lasts me 5.5 days
• one bag of dog food lasts me just under 2 weeks
• my conditioner usage rate is approximately 25% more than my shampoo usage rate
• exactly 31 shredded mini wheat thingies of Kashi Shredded Mini Wheats make up a morning's serving of breakfast
• properly frothed milk in my milk frother needs to be at the halfway mark when cold
• the 32 gallon trash container I have is only 1/2 full any given pickup day (which is every week)
• the 96 gallon recycle container I have is only 1/2 full any given pickup day (which is every other week)
• 2 Trader Joe's bags can adequately hold a weeks worth of food, averaging $80
• laundry increases by 2 whenever the SC stays with me for the week
• 2.5 days of with-SC and 3.5 days of non-SC dishes make a load of dishes for the washer
• 1 pound of lean ground beef yields 7 meatballs
• Burt's Bees face moisturizer (in the little glass jar) lasts more than 3 months (and counting!)
• it takes 32-35 minutes to mow my lawn
• 33 minutes on the elliptical yields 400 calories burned, but 45 minutes yields 500